Just Trust Me
by ExtraSpecial
Summary: Elliot's dreams seem to be coming true with the band Tokio Hotel, but what happens when it starts to unravle? A story of rebelian, betrayal, and Love With Tokio Hotel.
1. Chapter 1

"NO WAY!" I yelled straight into my best friend Tori's face. "NO FUCKING WAY!"

"Yes way! I can't believe I had an uncle with connections and never knew about it! I just thought he was good for pirated CD's at Christmas!" she yelled back. The magical items of my desire where only inches from my face, and they seemed to be glowing. Common sense told me that the flimsy pieces of cardstock were not gleaming, but I almost never used common sense. That's just how my brain works. I tend to follow my heart faster than my mind, and that generally gets me into a lot of sticky situations. But right now it wasn't about that, right now all my whacked out mind could think about was the fact that my best friend was holding two Tokio Hotel tickets in front of my hungry eyes.

"Gimme gimme, let me see it" I demanded, plucking the ticket from her hand. She was correct; they were genuine Tokio Hotel tickets, the bands name printed in bold letters at the top of the voucher. I read every word, every nonsense letter; just to be sure they weren't fakes. Then a certain piece of information caught my eye.

"Whoa. We are in the first row" I said, almost whispering this newfound information.

"Holy crap your right!" Tori replied, inspecting her own ticket.

"Ill make us shirts tonight, I was going to head over to the Jackpot after school anyways." I say, still in a complete sense of awe. The Jackpot was the place where I went to print my shirts, which is my hobby right now.

"Sounds great. And uh, Ellie? Let me keep your ticket before you loose it already. Don't deny the fact that you will." I unwillingly handed her my ticket, knowing it was the best for everyone. I'm probably one of the most unorganized people you will ever meet, and placing that sacred ticked into my giant black whole of a purse was not a smart move. I practically skipped off to my next class, which ironically was voice. My psycho Middle aged teacher made sure to shatter my happiness as soon as I walked in the door.

"Ms Walters, please enter my classroom in a more respectful way next time." Mrs. Georgiana informed me. Ok seriously, this lady has got to be in her mid thirties and she acts like she's 82. And she never, ever lets me sing the type of music I want to. I tried to convince her to let me sing this really awesome rock ballad for our winter voice recital, but no, I had to sing stupid show tunes. How typical.

I take my usual seat next to Sam, a fellow free spirit and good friend. I really admire the way she doesn't care if people judge her, not to mention her incredible ability to pull off any florescent color of eye liner imaginable. I practically burst into my story before Sam had even greeted me, and she seemed less then enthused.

"Hm, sounds nice" she said, skimming a new piece of music while I ranted about my ticket.

"That's it? That's all you have to say about Tokio Hotel tickets?" I say, not even bothering to pretend to read my own music. It's some stupid Baroque piece that makes no sense and has far too many notes per word.

"Their not really my taste, but that's great for you" Alex's taste consisted of really original indie stuff, like The Moldy Peaches.

"Aw come on Alex, you've got to respect for a band who can pull off dreads, a lions mane, and girl hair and still look hot" Just then I look up to see Mrs. Georgiana glaring at me from the piano.

"In my defense Mrs. George we were talking about music" she simply shook her head and went back to playing the notes of the hectic classical piece. I don't know why she hates me so much, I mean I do all the work and I'm not too shabby of a singer either. I guess she looks at me as a waste. I never want to do the stupid songs she assigns us, and to tell the truth I'm really not going to try to pursue a career in music.

I decided just to suck it up and work, because Mrs. Georgiana was threatening my grade if I didn't participate in class. As if she had been reading my mind, Mrs. George called me up to sing the song in front of the class. I let out a groan as I stood up and centered myself in front of the class. I sang the intricate baroque song watching Sam smile at me. When I was done, Mrs. George made it a point to say that my voice was too "modern" and how I needed to make it more dramatic, yada yada. I simply walked back to my seat and turned my ipod to "Ready, set, go!" and let Bill Kaulitz's voice drown out that of my teacher.


	2. Chapter 2

The Jackpot is basically empty when I walk in, only the owner, an obese man with an absurd amount of tattoos named Jack, is there. I sat down at a giant wooden table in the front of the store and began to sketch. Jack knew by now not to interrupt me when I'm sketching, I was pretty much a usual here by now. The sharpie flew across the paper like crazy, and my first design was complete before I knew it. I had the basic idea in my head, silhouettes' of all the band members with a really cool design in purple behind them. I knew immediately that this had to be Tori's, because tom's silhouette had ended up taking up most of the shirt. Tom was Tori's favorite, something about those dreads turned her on. I couldn't say I blamed her, because his twin brother was my personal choice. Not that I was some freak who stalks Bill looking for his boxers on eBay, ew. I really respect Bill, from a musician's point of view. Anyone who can sing in more then one language and still give people goose bumps is rated pretty high on my list.

I screened both of our shirts quickly, hoping to avoid tedious conversation with Jack. I drove my junkie pick-up home and carefully informed my mother about the concert this Friday. Of course at first she refused, this is the same woman who didn't want me to drive until I was eighteen, afraid I would be "Raving all night with junkies" (her words, not mine). Eventually, after about an hour of convincing her that I was "Simply going to see a wholesome music group", she agreed to let me go. I couldn't explain the amount of excitement I felt as I went to bed that night, so psyched to wake up Friday morning.

The school day passed tediously, as usual. But after what seemed like the longest day in the history of the world, it was time for the concert. I was so incredibly psyched I couldn't even stand it. Our seats where better then I could have imagined, I could see every bead of sweat dripping from Bill, I could even make out the solemn features of Gustav, and his drum set was pushed all the way to the back of the stage. Bill's voice sounded impeccable, it was amazing how much better they where live. I pulled my hair out of my braid and let it fall where it wanted as Tori and I danced to the music. I have to say, my hair is nothing like most people have ever seen before. It's naturally a golden blonde, but last summer I started putting these strawberry highlights, and well, that progressed until my hair became a spectrum of colors between gold and fire truck red. I like it though; it helps me stand out in our little town. It was pretty long too, it reached all the way to the middle of my waist. I guess my hair picked up the attention of Bill (who could blame him, my mass of crazy colored hair was pretty eye grabbing) because during the middle of "Live every second" he knelt down right in front of my face and almost sang the song to me. You cannot understand how my sporadically my heart was beating at that moment. After a minute or so, Bill stood up again and returned to his usual center stage spot, and to my surprise, at the end of the song, he winked at me.

"Tori did you see that?!"

"See what? Yeah Ellie, Bill Kaulitz just sang to you, I'm sure everyone just saw that" Tori responded.

"No not that! He totally just winked at me!"

"Don't push it now, Elliot" What does Tori know, she was ogling Tom the whole song.

The rest of the concert was absolutely rad. They even played some of their German songs, which I love. They seem so much more into it when they sing in their native language. Tori and I straggled to leave, not wanting to go but also noticing that the security guards were lingering just a little too close to us.

Suddenly, a deep voice shouted "HEY YOU!" Tori and I turned to see a giant security guard looming over us. Oh crap, I knew those tickets where to good to be true.


	3. Chapter 3

"Yes sir?" I replied, trying to act all sweet and innocent.

"Come with me please ladies" he said, turning and walking towards the main building of the concert stadium.

"Hey, yo, dude, where are you taking us? You can't just ignore me here. Oh my gosh Ellie, he's kidnapping us!" Tori was in full on freak out mode as we fallowed the man into a long, poorly lit hallway. The man simply grunted when Tori mentioned kidnapping. He made a sudden turn, and opened one of the many doors and ushered us inside.

Tori realized what was happening before I did, letting out an awkward yelp. As soon as I comprehended that Bill, Tom, Georg, and Gustav where sitting in front of us the only words that could escape my lips where "Holy fuck"

With that Tom burst into fits of laughter, Bill just smirked and leaned forward in his chair. And I thought my heart was going crazy before, man was I underestimating the speed my heart could go. Slowly, Bill stood from his chair and held out his hand towards me.

"Hello, I'm Bill" He said in his thick German accent. "And this is my annoying brother Tom" gesturing to Tom, who leaned forward towards us both.

I took his hand and shook it lightly, unsure of what to say to my musical idol.

"I know, I mean, yeah, I mean, ugh. My names Elliot" I said, still gripping his hand. He didn't seem to mind it; his hand felt warm and tingly like it belonged there.

"Uh, that's my friend Tori. She's a little short of words right now" I said, gesturing to Tori, who was simply gaping at Tom.

Suddenly, Tom spoke in German to his brother. "Hey, this one's cute; you think I could get her back to the hotel?" completely unaware of the fact that I took German for 3 years already. I suddenly became very self conscious, looking down at my plaid skirt. It wasn't that short, what would make Tom think I was just one of his fan whores? Not that I'm not totally flattered that one of the Kaulitz brothers just called me cute, I just prefer not to be recognized as someone who "goes back to hotels" with people.

"No, this one has morals, I can tell." Bill responded in German.

"How do you know?" Tom said, standing.

"I just do" both of the brothers where looking me over now, leaving me in a state of shock.

"Um guys? I study German in school." I said. Tom and Bill both turned equal shades of pink and Georg and Gustav laughed their pants off in the background. Tori couldn't help laugh at that one either, even though she takes Spanish and had no idea what they had just said.

"Well anyways" said Bill, still slightly pink in the cheeks. "I wanted to know where you got those shirts. Their really cool and their not part of our merchandise"

"Oh, yeah. I made them, actually." I said, looking down at my shirt.

"Really?" The entire band said in unison.

"Yeah. I design them and go to this shop where they let me screen them onto the shirts"

Bill took a step towards me and carefully looked over my shirt. Suddenly the air was stiff, and I found it hard to breath. He carefully laid a single finger on the Tokio Hotel words on my core. Slowly, he traced the silhouetted band members on my shirt, stopping when he got to himself. He looks up into my eyes and smiles a glorious smile. One of those life changing smiles you don't forget even when your 102 and cant remember your own name.

"Its very beautiful" he says, quietly. Nothing in the entire world could tear my eyes from his right now.

Suddenly we both are forced to break the gaze as Tori clears her throat. I turn my head to see her laughing giddily as Tom played with his lip ring. Bill and I both roll our eyes and he goes up and effortlessly plants a 5 star on his brothers back.

"Oh I'm ganna get you for that brother" Tom says as he whips around and chases Bill around the squishy dressing room furniture. To tell you the truth it was basically the most hilarious thing you will ever see. Bill jumped over an armchair with ease in his tight pants, but Tom on the other hand completely trips (due to his extremely baggy wardrobe) and does this awesome summersault thing and completely knocks Bill over into a frenzy of laughs. By now the entire room is dying as Tom and Bill stand up and brush themselves off.

"Sorry about that" Bill says, elbowing his brother.

"Trust me, it was my pleasure to watch" I say, collecting myself from the giggle fit. I look down at my cell and realize its 12:06.

"Shit" I say, showing the time to Tori.

"What is it?" Bill asks, suddenly becoming concerned.

"Ive got to go, or my mom's going to think ive pierced half my face by now." I say.

"I can arrange that" says Tom with a smirk.

"Thanks but no thanks" Tori says to Toms offer.

"I have to go, I'm so sorry" I say to Bill, shrugging my shoulders helplessly.

"It's ok, here, give me your hand" I hold out my hand and Bill scrawls his email and phone number on it. I do the same on his, almost too nervous to remember my own number. He holds my hand in his softly for a minute, squeezes it, and then lets me go. Tori and I wave goodbye as we reluctantly close the door behind us. That's when I realize what just happened.

"Holy fuck, Bill Kaulitz's number is written on my hand!"


	4. Chapter 4

My mom had a conniption when I got home, but I really could care less. I open up my laptop to check my email, even though its around 2 in the morning. I was thrown for a loop when my email shouts "YOU GOT MAIL!" I mean seriously, I think I can figure it out for myself, thanks. My mouth almost hit the floor when I recognized my new email was from the address written on my palm. I opened it quickly, reading it three times before it actually sunk in.

Elliot-

I guess I don't really have a reason to be righting right now, ive been trying to think of one for the last hour. I guess the best excuse I can think of is that I really want you to make me a shirt, because the ones you make look really cool. But its kind of obvious that your amazing clothes design isn't the only reason I'm emailing you. I don't know, you're just a really cool person and… I don't know I guess I'm just rambling now. Please write back even though I sound kind of stupid right now.

-Bill

And I did, and fast. I wrote that id be more then willing to make him a shirt and that he didn't sound stupid rambling. Within minutes a new email appeared, shocking me even further. This one read:

Elliot-

Thanks for agreeing to make me a shirt. I was actually was wondering if maybe we could go together? It's just an idea, I mean, you don't have to or anything. The concert you went to was the last one in our tour so we have a couple of months off, and I was kinda hoping we could spend a little time together?

-Bill

I couldn't believe it. Yesterday the closest id ever been to Bill was his Cd cover, and now he was personally emailing me- at 3o'clock in the morning.

Saturday morning I get up with butterflies fluttering in my stomach. I carefully pulled on my grey skinny jeans and my favorite t-shirt, the first one I ever made. I did my make-up as usual (okay yeah, I put on more mascara then usual, but you would to if you where meeting a rock star) and told my mom I was going to the Jackpot. I conveniently left out the fact that I was meeting a make up wearing singer in a band. I drove up to the hotel where the band was staying at and sat down in the lobby. Quietly, trying to avoid the uber-gay concierge at the check in desk, I pulled out my ipod. I switched the song to a really good Red Jumpsuit Apparatus song, sink into the overstuffed armchair and close my eyes. I let the song slowly seep into every pore of my being, just like I always do when I want to calm jitters. After a minute or so, I start to sense something is going on around me, so I peak an eye open. I let out a staggered breath as I see Bill leaning over me in my armchair. I was still surprised to see him there, half expecting him to totally ditch me and watch me sit here for hours and laugh.

"I'm sorry, did I scare you?" he said, his voice coated in his thick accent.

"No, just startled me, that's all. And we can speak German if you want; I know English isn't exactly your talent." I replied.

"Oh thank god" Bill said, smiling and holding a hand out to pull me out of the chair. I let out a laugh at his relief and took his hand. I saw him glance over my outfit quickly, and then he spoke.

"I like your pants" Bill gestured towards my jeans.

"Feel free to barrow them any time" I said, being fully aware of Bill's girl-pants obsession.

"I am going to take you up on that offer" Omigosh, Bill just said he wanted to wear my pant. Ok Ellie, get out of stupid fan girl mode and just pretend he's another guy from school.

"Do you mind if I drive?" I ask.

"Not at all, actually. It might help keep the paparazzi away. Wait, how old are you?" He asked. Aw crap, I knew this would come up.

"Sixteen" I reply.

"Seriously?" he responded, looking at me, studying my features.

"Yeah."

"You look a lot more…mature. I thought you would be closer to my age" He said, looking ahead for my car.

"Ill be seventeen in a couple of months, and I am pretty mature for my age. Unless, of course, you count the times that my friends and I launch water balloons off my roof… but that's another story." I said, recalling the time Tori and I pelted water balloons at my dorky stalker neighbor. Maybe I shouldn't have told him that when I'm trying to convince him that I'm not too young. Oh well, damage is done.

Surprisingly, he laughed, a cute, loud, echoing laugh.

"I cant say I blame you. You need to see us on tour when we are just hanging around. If you saw all the shit me and Tom played on Georg this year you would just die." He said with a smile.

"Ha-ha I'm sure. Wait, I think I have a video of Tori and I on here playing with her fish!" I say, whipping out my cell and showing him the video.

"How do you play with fi- oh." Bill says, suddenly understanding the meaning of "playing with fish" He starts laughing heartily and then whips out his own phone, showing me a video of Him and Tom totally pants-ing Georg and Gustav at the same time. We both just stand there in the parking lot, laughing our asses off for about fifteen minutes before we collect ourselves enough to walk to my car.

"Um, Ellie? What the hell is that" he says, pointing to my truck.

"That is my pick-up. And our ride" I say as I unlock the door and slide into the drivers seat.

"I hate to break it too you Elliot, but your car is a piece of shit." Bill informs me as he slips into the passenger side, his tall hair brushing the ceiling of my truck.

"Well, not all of us can afford a giant Cadillac now can we?" I say, shoving the keys into the ignition and urging the car to start. Bill just smiled and looked out the window.


	5. Chapter 5

I pulled up to my usual parking space in front of The Jackpot. Bill stepped out of my hunk of junk and took a look at the store. It didn't look like much from the outside, granite walls like the rest of the stores in the plaza, its glass doors completely covered in skateboard stickers. I looked around the parking lot on the damp Sunday morning and noticed a couple more cars then usual in the normally deserted lot. I decided that the local skaters in the town had come to talk to Jack and shrugged off the strange feeling.

"Well it looks… um homey?" Bill said, trying to find words to fit the Jackpot.

"Oh yes, that's the perfect way to describe it" I say back. We slowly walk towards the store, kicking tiny pieces of asphalt as we ventured. He opened the heavy glass door and took a breath of the familiar warm air. Jack was napping with his feet propped up on the desk. I let out a laugh and explained to Bill the role of Jack in the Jackpot.

"He bought the store 10 years ago and basically uses it as a giant bedroom." I explained, sitting down at my usual wooden table. Bill took the stool next to me as I yanked my sketchbook and sharpies out of my giant purse. I tear out a sheet for bill and plop it in front of him.

"Your ganna make me draw?" he asks, banging his head on the table, his giant hair not moving an inch.

"That's generally part of the process. Don't think you get out of the hard part just because you're a big rock star man." I say, jabbing the paper with my index finger.

"Ugh, I'm the twin with no artistic ability. Tom would love this; he has always been good at art. When I told him what we were doing today he spent like, a full 6 hours of whining that he wanted to come too." Bill replies, leaning on the table and looking at me.

"Ha-ha I can see that. Why didn't you let him come?" I say, imitating him leaning on the table.

"I wanted to spend time with you." He replies in utter seriousness. I'm in shock for about a minute and then I realize that I'm blushing.

"Well, we will just have to make him a shirt so he doesn't feel quite so bad" I say, not sure what to reply to his last statement.

"Ill make you a deal" he says, sitting up. "Ill give you my shirt if you give me yours."

"That sounds an awful lot like a one sided deal there buddy" I reply as I jab him in the shoulder.

"I know, I barely get anything out of it. You get a shirt made by the one and only me!" Bill sits up even more, puffing out his chest. I poke him in the torso and he instantly deflates as we both laugh.

"All right" I say in between giggles. "But you have to promise you will wear it somewhere."

"I have this charity concert next week, ill wear it there" He replies. We both start to draw in silence. After a minute or so Bill holds up his paper for my opinion, and I simply burst out in laughter.

"I think I have a career in T shirt making" He say. All the paper has on it is the simple saying 'I can't draw' written in big, sloppy block letters.

"I agree. I think its cute, id wear it." I say, looking up at him with a smile. Suddenly we both blush and I return to my drawing. He leans over my shoulder with utter seriousness, watching me draw. Unexpectedly I feel him lightly place a hand right below my shoulders. I was so distracted for a minute that I completely forgot I was drawing, and then I realized what I was supposed to be doing. My idea was to have this big cartoon airplane, one of those vintage ones, and then written in the clouds was JUMBIE!

"That's amazing" he says, running his fingers over the paper. "I can't believe someone can draw that" I had finished, and I thought it looked pretty snazzy, if I do say so myself. We both started on Tom's shirt next, I drew a big guitar in the center with curling strings and a snapped neck, and then above it Bill wrote 'Brake Barriers'.

I brought him into the back, where I showed him how to use the screening machine (without injuring himself, which I still haven't perfected to this day). It turned out that we were both the same size shirt, in woman's sizes of course. I grabbed an XXL for tom, who no doubt wanted his shirt to be huge. He seemed genuinely stunned at how good his shirt looked when we where done.

"I still get your shirt there, that was our deal" I said, grabbing the shirt out of his hands.

"Hey, I'm good with that, the shirt you made looks amazing" he replied, stealing my shirt from the table. We sat down for a while, just talking.

"I want to know you Elliot" he said, gazing at me with his big brown eyes. "Tell me about yourself."

"Well, I go to school at East Ridge, spend most of my time here other then that. I take German, obviously, art, and voice along with all the regular subjects-"

"Wait, you sing?" Bill interrupts.

"Yeah, I can't believe I forgot to tell you that. Our teacher is a major classical bitch though; she only lets me sing opera, show tunes, and jazz stuff. Its so annoying, and she wont even let me sing rock ballads!"

"I know! It's the same way back in Germany, Tom and I used to get so mad at our teacher because she didn't like the way we expressed ourselves. They didn't accept originality in our music classes"

"I completely know where you're coming from" I say, gazing at Bill. "My friend Zach wrote this really good rap once and our teacher gave him an F on the thing because he didn't have enough melodic repetition or something like that" We sat there for hours, talking about everything from rap to Pezz dispensers.

"Well, I guess we should be getting back" Bill said. I agreed unwillingly.

"Hey, they guys and I rented out the hotel pool tomorrow, you wanna come? It will just be us guys but it will be pretty fun" Bill asks as we get up from the table.

"Yeah, sounds awesome" I replied, trying not to sound too eager.

"And bring those cookies you told me about too" I had told Bill about my masterful culinary talents. In other words I'm a pretty beast cookie baker.

"Sure thing" Bill opens the heavy glass door to see the last thing I expected.


	6. Chapter 6

There must have been a million people outside, all with cameras, taking our picture. I figured out that they must be paparazzi, and so did Bill.

"Shit" I heard him say quietly to himself. He quickly grasps my hand and pulls me out of the Jackpot, slightly jogging to my pick-up. The whole thing felt like a giant blur, people where everywhere, yelling in both English and German and taking our picture. I hoped into the driver's seat and flew out of the parking lot as soon as Bill closed his door. I used the back streets of my suburban town to loose the cars who stalked us, and Bill remained silent in the passenger seat. Eventually, when I was sure there was no one fallowing us, I pulled over near our town park.

"Bill, its ok, I lost them" I said, trying to get him to say something.

"I really didn't want to do that to you, launch you into the spotlight like that" he said back, not looking at me but still out the car window. "I mean I knew that eventually people would put two and two together or I would blab to a reporter or something but not this soon-"

"Bill what the hell are you talking about?" I ask, interrupting his rant.

"I thought I could keep you out of the spotlight for a while, you don't know the things that jealous fans will do" he said turning to me.

We sat there in silence for a minute, saying nothing and just looking at each other. Abruptly, Bill opened his car door and got out. At first I didn't know wither I should get out as well, but then he walked around to my side of the car and opened the door for me. I got out without a word, and he closed the door behind me. But instead of moving away, like I thought he would, he locked his eyes on mine, and slowly took a step closer. I was pinned between the car and Bill, and I couldn't say I was protesting. He gently lifted my chin with a black polished hand, and his face was so close to mine that I realized what was happening. I closed my eyes and was suddenly emerged into Bills gentle kiss. Everything suddenly made sense, like a lost part of me had been found.

There was even more paparazzi at the hotel, but to tell you the truth I could care less. Bill held my hand as we walked into the hotel lobby, dodging camera men and people shouting. Once we were safely inside the lobby we spoke again.  
"Ill see you tomorrow" he said, moving a colorful piece of hair from my face.

"I can't wait" Bill leaned in and kissed me again, just a peck this time but it still gave me goose bumps. When he broke away, I pulled him back again, not wanting for him to leave. I grabbed another quick peck and he laughed as he walked back to his room.

I drove home quickly and called Tori, filling her in on my day. She spent most of the phone call screaming, and then calmed down for a minute, and then started screaming again when I told her my plans for tomorrow.

"I will forever be in your debt if you let me come tomorrow" Tori pleaded.

"Tori, no offense or anything, but they didn't really invite you." I said to her.

"Okay, I guess I get it" she says. "I still can't believe that Bill kissed you"

"Neither can I" I said quietly.

The next morning I awoke to my mother ripping the sheets off of me way to early.

"Ugh, mom its only 9:30 and its Sunday. I'm going back to sleep" I rolled over to yell at her.

"No you are going to meet your father and I in the kitchen, pronto. Family meeting time" she said in a somber tone.

I stumbled downstairs, still in my pajamas curious to investigate why my mom seemed so pissed. My Mom and dad both sat at the kitchen counter, still in bathrobes. I slumped into the seat across from them, and my dad simply glared at me. My mother threw a thin sheet of newsprint at me and I took a look at it. At the top of the paper, the headline read 'Tokio Hotel's Bill Kaulitz found a Local Lady.' I was stunned to see two pictures in front of me, one was of Bill and I walking out of The Jackpot hand in hand, and the other was a blurry picture of Bill and I kissing through the window of the hotel.

"Oh crud" I said quietly.

"Yeah, you can imagine my shock when I opened up the paper looking for the score of yesterdays game and seeing my baby girl kissing- this!" he said, gesturing towards the picture.

"His name is Bill" I said quietly.

"Well at least it's a guy, when I first looked at it I though it was a girl!" my mother stated. "I shouldn't have to mistake the people you are kissing for girls, Elliot, let alone see it in the newspaper."

"I'm sorry, we didn't want it to be in the news. He tried really hard to keep me out of the spotlight." I said, trying to argue my point.

"Who is this guy anyway?" my father asked, still simmering mad.

"A singer, from a German band" I said.

"Oh no, you will not be dating any German rock stars young lady!" my mother shouted from across the table. I shuddered and tried to get them both to calm down.

"Um, no offense mom, but it's kind of too late for that. He's really sweet, and not really rock star-ish."

"But look at what he…wears. He wears more make up then you do Elliot! Not to mention his hair, I don't even want to talk about his hair." My mom said, pointing at the pictures.

"Mom, why do you care? You guys all taught me not to judge people, and I think he looks cute like that" I said, examining his picture. My father started rubbing is temples at the word 'cute'.

"No, I refuse to let you date this guy, Ellie. He's not right for you. You don't want to date someone in the 'business', right?" my Dad said, placing a hand on my arm.

"How would you know Dad? How would you know what he's like or if he's right for me? That's right, you don't even know him" I exploded at my parents. I stood up from the table and walked off towards my room.


	7. Chapter 7

I threw on my Volcom bathing suit and then a pair of denim cut-offs and a purple tank top over it. I carefully French braided my hair, its been died so much that if I put it in a pony tail it only damages my hair more. I sprinted downstairs and stuck my cookies in the oven, avoiding my parents who still where sitting at the counter.

Once I felt the cookies where done, I yanked them out of the oven and arranged them neatly on a plate. I completely ignored my parents as they asked me questions.

"Elliot, where in gods name do you think your going?" My father asked as I headed towards the door.

"I'm going to hang with Bill for a while, don't wait up." I mumbled.

"Oh no your not." My father said, lurching towards the door.

"Oh yeah? Just watch me" I said, slamming the door and hoping into my pick-up.

None of the hotel employees asked who I was or why I was there as I walked into the lobby; I'm guessing they all read the paper that morning. However the extremely gay concierge was pointing me out to the Woman and her 2 children checking out of the hotel. I tried to pretend I didn't notice them and just walked towards the pool signs with my cookies in hand. I saw the guys before I even entered the pool room through the tiny window, but the giant security guard who I recognized as the one from the concert suddenly blocked my view.

"Um, I'm Elliot, Bill invited me?" I said to him, shrugging my shoulders and hoping he would let me pass. He simply nodded and opened the door, making all the guys turn to look at me. Everyone was in their suits already, and I felt just a smidgen bit awkward around so many shirtless rockers.

Bill and Tom both sprung from the beach chairs that they sat on when they saw me enter, and every one but Bill burst into hoops and hollers (and a few kissy noises). Tom and Bill both ran towards me, obviously racing. Tom got to me first and embraced me in a shirtless hug.

"Elliot that shirt is amazing! I don't know how Bill found you before I did man!" Tom said lifting me off the ground.

"Tom-cant-breath" I stammered as he let me go. I set my cookies down on a chair and turned to Bill.

"Hey Ellie" He said, pulling me into a loving hug. I sink into him, pulling him tighter towards me. I let go just a little bit to plant a kiss on his lips. Tom made a whoop noise, and then Bill was kissing me harder, and I couldn't say I obliged. He let go of me too soon but tried to make up for it by placing an arm around my shoulders.

"Thank god he let her go" Tom says, nudging Georg with his elbow. "I thought she was ganna leave here pregnant"

"You sure know a lot about that Tom, with all those impregnated fan girls out there who claim you're their baby daddy cant all be lying, can they?" I say. Bill breaks down laughing and Georg leans towards me with a high five.

I pull off my tank top and shorts while their all distracted, trying to avoid the obvious male attention that comes when you take off your shirt. Bill and I sit on a pool chair as the guys calm down.

"Why is no one in the pool?" I ask, gesturing towards the crystal clear water.

"Oh, we can change that." Tom says, standing up. Before I can realize what's going on, Bill grabs me under the arms and Tom slips his arms under my knees and both of the brothers are carrying me towards the pool.

"Ah! No! Bill I swear if you do this, I will never kiss you again!" I say, tilting my head awkwardly so I'm looking up at Bill.

"I'm afraid I cant do this on those conditions, but since you wont be kissing Tom anytime soon…" Bill replies, handing me off to Tom.

"Payback time!" Tom yells as I suddenly feel a rush of coolness around me. I swim upwards, gasping for air. The first thing I hear is laughing, and then I see Tom taking bows by the pools edge.

"I'm going to get you for that Thomas!" I yell to him from the pool.

"Oh, the war is on" Tom yells back. Behind him I see Bill running towards the pool and then he links an arm around Tom and jumps into the water. Tom yells several swear words before he hits the water, and Gustav and Georg jump in after them. The next three hours is spent in a giant splash war, which eventually morphed into a game of chicken (first Bill vs. Tom, then Me vs. Tom, and finally Me vs. Gustav). Then, somehow I became the judge in an extreme diving contest, in which most of the dives involved crude sexual references.

After that we were all basically pooped so we settled down to munch on my cookies. Bill laid down into a long beach chair, and I nestled my way into his arms.

"You've got a keeper there Bill" Georg said, mouth full of cookies.

"Yeah she can bake and she doesn't mind your extreme lack of masculinity" Tom said, grabbing another cookie. Bill leans over and smacks him in the back of the head, causing him to drop the cookie onto the wet tile.

"Aw crap Bill, you made me drop the cookie" He complains, staring at the soggy baked good with despair.

"Its ok Thomas, here you go" I say, handing him another sugar cookie and patting his dreadlocked head. I leaned back into Bill, and he wrapped his arms around me and held me tight.


	8. Chapter 8

"So are we going out tonight or what?" Gustav asked, lifting his sunglasses off of his eyes and letting them rest on the top of his head among his curly blonde locks.

"Yeah man, I'm in desperate need of some booty!" Tom yells, Georg and Gustav grunt in agreement and I simply slap my forehead into my palm.

"You did not just say that in the presence of a girl" I say to him.

"Oh yeah, sorry, forgot you where a chick for a minute" Tom shrugs his shoulders.

"I didn't" Bill said, tightening his grip around me. I snuggled a little closer to his bare chest, and watched Tom roll his eyes.

"Are there any good clubs around here?" Georg asks me.

"Well there's this place called the Blue Moon, its pretty rad there." I reply, all the guys just stare at me with confused looks on their faces.

"Oh, sorry, American slang. Its pretty awesome." I say, fixing my mistake.

"You want to come with us tonight Ellie?" Tom asks, shoving another one of my cookies into his mouth. Clubbing on a Sunday night wasn't exactly the brightest idea, but I couldn't find it in myself to turn down this offer.

"Yeah, sounds sweet." I decide.

"Wait, don't you have school tomorrow?" Bill asks, as Tom starts laughing again.

"Oh yeah, I forgot you where underage" Tom says, causing George and Gustav to chuckle behind him.

"Ill be fine. It's the end of the year anyways, we aren't learning much." I lied. I should be studying for finals, but come on, hanging out with my new boyfriend and favorite band slightly outweighed sitting at home with a textbook.

"We can drive you to your house so you can get ready and then we can just leave from there" Georg decides, organizing the night.

"Good, my parents aren't home on Sundays." I say, feeling relieved.

"Do you not want me to meet your parents?" Bill asked, suddenly hurt. I could feel him straighten up a little in pain.

"No! No, its not that. We are kinda in a fight right now, that's all" I say, reassuring him. I press the side of my face into his chest, listening to his heart beat.

"What about?" he asks, curious.

"Um…just stuff. Ya know, parent teenager stuff." I mumble. I'm guessing the fact that my parents referred to him as an 'it' for a whole conversation.

"It was about the paper this morning, and us, wasn't it" He said, sternly.

"Basically. They just need to get to know you; right now they just know you as the German singer with big hair that is kissing their daughter in the newspaper." I told him, Bill just let out a sigh. I could tell he was disappointed, and to tell the truth, I was too. I wish my parents could just accept who I date and have trust in me to find the right guys.

The entire pool room is silent for the first time, everyone was just thinking to themselves. After a moment, Gustav finally broke the silence.

"Uh, unless we are going out in our bathing suits, I think we should go get ready." The guys all sat up in agreement, and Bill took my hand as we headed to their rooms. The entire hall was lined in body guards as we approached the two rooms belonging to the band. Tom opened the room that he and Bill stayed in, and it was the most luxurious hotel room id ever seen. There where 5 separate rooms, two bedrooms, two bathrooms, and a main living area, all relatively large. I flopped down on Bills king sized bed while he rummaged through the drawers. He chucked a black shirt and jeans at me and then turned to examine his outfit as I held it up.

"I give it an A+" I say, looking down at his shirt.

"Hm, I'm not sure I think I need a closer look" He said with a smile, and crawled onto the bed towards me.

"Oh really? I think you should look into prescription glasses." I state, leaning back as Bill crawls over me with a smile. He was over me by now, leaning over me on all fours. I stretch my arms straight up and then wrap them around his neck, pouting my lips a bit. His black hair fell into my face as he gazed at me with utter contentment. Bills face gets closer as he cranes his head down just enough so his lips brushed mine. And again, he kissed me over and over until I pulled him down onto me, intertwining my fingers in his hair. His lips engulfed mine; I wasn't just in a hotel making out with a rock star. I was kissing the guy I loved and we were just together, he was just a guy, and I was just a girl.

Abruptly, someone coughed from the door way. My conscious told me that we should probably stop kissing, but my heart told me, screw them, I'm busy at the moment. I felt one of Bills hands come off the right side of the bed.

"Aw come on brother, don't flick me off for a chick!" Tom yelled at his twin. I flung my right hand up and flicked him off myself, hearing him laugh in the background. Bill gently rolls off me and lays down next to me.

"Oh, hey Tom, when did you get here?" Bill says, throwing a pillow at him.

"Come on, we are ganna be late" Tom yells at him, throwing the pillow back at him, which Bill caught in mid air. He ran into the bathroom quickly and then ran out completely dressed.

"I'm doing my hair and make-up at your house" He said, pulling me off the bed.

"Ha-ha you sounded like a girl when you said that" I tell him as he puts an arm around my shoulders.

"That's nice to know, that the girl I just made out with thinks I sound like a girl"

"Well not many guys I know wear so much make-up! But its cute on you." I tell him. Gustav and Georg are already waiting for us in the lobby, so I lead them all to my truck. Tom has a fit about how he doesn't want to ride in my 'giant piece of scrap metal', but I "gently" push him, Georg, and Gustav into the backseat. Bill hoped into the passenger seat as Tom leaned forward and blasted some rap music from my radio. Bill and I both groan but I let him keep it on, watching him dance in the backseat was fairly amusing.


	9. Chapter 9

I pulled into my empty driveway with care, just in case one of the neighbors was watching. The guys shuffled into my house, looking around like they had never seen a suburban American home before.

The band seemed out of place next to my department store furniture and collected tacky pieces of home décor. Tom headed for my fridge first, Georg and Gustav in tow behind him. Bill picked up the newspaper, still on the kitchen table from this morning, and shook his head. I pulled the paper from his hands, not allowing him to reflect over it. Tom all ready had his hands on a piece of cold pizza by the time I got to him, I slammed the fridge door close before he made an impact on our food supply.

"Don't brake anything" I warn them all as I head for my bedroom. I slip into a green dress quickly and throw on a pair of heels I liked before I go to find the guys again. They had found their way up the stairs and stood anxiously outside my door.

"Uh, where can I do my hair?" Bill asked, his big brown eyes seemed especially lovely. I take his hand and lead him to my bathroom. We both lean into my mirror, side by side, doing our make up at the same time.

"Aw, how cute. They can do their make up together!" Tom exclaims from my bathroom door frame. Bill simply rolls his eyes and continues ringing his eyes with black eye liner. I do my usual make up, smoke out my eyes with purple and black shadow and pounds of mascara. Once I think I look satisfactory, I shake my hair out of my braid and decide to leave it curly.

"You look stunning" Bill said with a smile.

"Well thanks, you look pretty snazzy yourself" I place I finger on his nose. He scrunches his nose up and reaches for my hairspray can.

Bill drains my hairspray faster then I have ever seen, engulfing my bathroom with fumes. Tom appears to be used to it, while I am in an epileptic coughing fit. Bill apologizes with a light kiss and I pull him and Tom back down stairs where Gustav and Georg where playing with a paper airplane across my kitchen table. I push the entire band out the door and into my truck as fast as I can, paranoid that there might be any signs in my house that they had been there.

"Well that was…rushed." Bill stated as he sat in the passenger seat, looking a little stunned.

"That was the plan" I said as I pulled out of my driveway. Bill remained silent in the seat next to me, it felt very harsh.

"I promise you will be back there soon enough" I tell him. I smile forms on his previously pursed lips.

We drove for a while with out talking, the guys played with my radio and fought over stations but that was it. By the time we pulled into the Blue Moon it was dark, the black lights glowed from inside the club. Bill opened my door for me and took my hand as we walked in together.

There where a few screaming girls when we entered the club, but the guys seemed to be used to it. Tom, Georg, and Gustav all signed quick autographs but Bill denied the flying papers in his face. He kept walking towards a table with his hand intertwined in mine. The table he chose was circular, with a couch that wrapped around one half of it. Bill pulled me into his arms again as soon as everyone was seated. They all ordered their drinks, alcoholic of course, while I just asked for a water bottle. We sat there for a while, avoiding the crowded dance floor.

"Urgh! I want to dance but I don't want to come off like…" Tom struggled for a word.

"A creeper?" I offer. He shakes his head approvingly. He

is fidgeting in his seat, just dying to go out there and dance.

Suddenly his face lights up.

"Hey Bill…" Tom begins. Bill immediately gets a worried grin on his face.

"Tom, everyone already thinks I'm gay. Dancing with my brother wont really help." Bill says, sipping his drink.

"No! I was actually wondering if I could barrow your girl for a few minutes." Tom asked.

"Thanks for asking my opinion on this Tom" I say. Bill looks at me wearily, wanting to know if I actually wanted to take up Toms offer.

"Ill do it, if its okay with you" I ask Bill. He ponders for a moment, and then he nods in agreement.

"BROTHER I LOVE YOU!" Tom bursts from his seat and grabbed my arms, pulling me from Bill's grasp.

"Bring her back in one piece!" Bill yells, but I can barely hear him over the thumping music. The bass is sending shivers down my spine as Tom pulls me through the crowd. A few girls give me vicious glances but I ignore them. They can have Tom if they want, I was here for Bill. Tom finally stopped in the middle of the floor and turned to me, moving with the music. I copied his movements, adding my own feminine twist to them. I had to admit, Tom was an awesome dancer. With his genuine Kaulitz grin and moving hips I couldn't help but blush for a moment. He smirked his little smirk and grabbed my hands, pulling me closer to him. I must have been gradually moving towards him, because before I knew it his hand was resting firmly on the small of my back and I could feel his hot breath on my neck. I placed a hand on his shoulder, feeling his thin frame under his baggy clothes. I move my face so that it is in front of his so that our noses weren't even a centimeter apart. For a moment, I feel that Tom is going to lean in and kiss me, and for a split second I wanted him too.

I jump out of sink of the music, standing completely still on the dance floor. At first Tom moves for me, trying to make up for the space I had made between us. Then, I believe the same thing that had struck me struck Tom, and he leapt back. We stood there, just staring at each other for what seemed like forever. Suddenly someone places a warm hand on my shoulder and I turn to see Bill looking down at me with a smile.

"He didn't rape you or anything, did he?" Bill asked, only partially joking. I wrap my arms around his waist and pull him towards me before I can even think about what I was doing. _You have Bill. You Have Bill. You don't need Tom…_ I thought to myself.

"Hey" He said in a soft voice, full of concern. "What happened to her?" He asked his brother. Toms eyes are wide and he seemed fairly frazzled.

"Uh… Nothing. I think maybe a fan might have grabbed at her or something." He lied.

"I think we should go" Bill said, gently pulling my arm towards the door.

"I don't want to spoil everybody's fun. I can stay" I say, finally mustering up the right words to say.

Bill remains quiet for a moment, considering what I had to say.

"Only for another hour, but then we are leaving." Bill said. I sunk into Bill for the rest of the night, trying to shut out all thoughts.


	10. Chapter 10

To say school that week was exiting was an understatement. Monday I was shocked by the amount of teenage girls who where willing to sell their soul to me for a lock of Bill's hair or a dreadlock from Tom. A lot of the male student body whistled at me when I walked through the halls, which got annoying after the first three times. Oh, and I forgot to mention the several girls who tried to kill me or bitch me out for 'stealing their true love'. By the end of the day I was under the impression that our entire school read the newspaper. My most interesting conversation was with Mrs. Georgiana:

"Elliot, I would like to speak to you for a moment." She said at the end of voice class.

"Uh yeah sure Mrs. George." I replied.

"I'm afraid I read the newspaper Sunday morning and I have something I would like to say about it" I rolled my eyes, the last person I wanted to know about my relationship status was my antique voice teacher.

"Uh… Okay?"

"Now, I may seem like your slumpy old voice teacher, but I have been around. When I used to star on Broadway, and I know what its like to work with singers. In fact, I dated a few of them myself…"

Oh. My. God.

"Uh, Mrs. George? I thing I have to go…" I say quickly. I had to get out of this conversation. Now.

"…And sometimes they can be so convincing! Its like- Oh, well then, get to class now Elliot. Just remember, No means no." She warned me before I sprint out of the class room.

Everyday after school I drove to Bills hotel, where he either helped me out with my homework (which became distracting when he started kissing my neck during my math homework) or just hung out and talked. Occasionally Gustav or Georg would pop in and say hello, but Tom was never there. Bill said he was out for publicity reasons, but my gut told me that wasn't the case. I had to admit though, I was glad I didn't have to see him for now.

I partially used this time to escape from my ignorant parents. I didn't come home until around ten every night, so I didn't have to talk to them. Yeah, I guess I sound like a baby here, but I didn't want to talk to people who didn't like my boyfriend. Our first real conversation was on Thursday. I had to stop home to grab some money, Bill was taking me out to see a band he had heard of from Gustav. My constant interest in band merch was beside bill, so I went home to grab some cash. I was thoroughly surprised to see my mother looming over the kitchen counter when I walked into my house.

"Long time, no see." My mother commented harshly.

"I'm just grabbing some money, Ill be out of your way in a minute" I muttered as I grabbed some cash from the drawer.

"Wait a minute, please." She said. The somber tone in her voice made me stop and turn towards her. I don't know how I didn't see the depressed features in her face before. She looked like she hadn't slept in a great while.

"Look, your father and I- We know we didn't handle this situation very well. And we want to make it up to you…" She started. I still lingered across the room from her, like an animal steering clear of its predator.

"And how do you plan to do that?" I say angrily.

"We are willing to give this guy a chance…" She paused. "If he comes over to meet us." At first, I dread the thought of it. But then, after a minute of consideration, It sounds like a possibility.

"When?" I ask, taking a step towards her.

"Tomorrow, if that's all right. And I was wondering… If I could meet them all. The whole band." Okay, now that was a bad idea. Manwhore Tom+ My wholesome Mom and Dad= Problems.

"Why cant you just meet Bill?" I ask her.

"Because you have practically been living with them all! If you like them so much, I would like to meet them too." I guess that sounded like a good reason.

"All right" I agree. Without warning, My mother lurches from across the kitchen and embraces me in a sudden hug. I guess it was better then having her be so bitter.


	11. Chapter 11

"Does my hair look all right?" Bill asks Friday night, pulling at pieces of his black mane. I laugh at his inability to see his obvious beauty.

"You look very handsome." I reply, taking both of his hands in mine. Tom gags in the background but I simply ignore him. I pull open my familiar front door for the guys to enter my house.

They seemed a bit less stunned this time, but still very out of place. Before I could even say another thing to Bill, My mom bursts into the room.

"You must be Bill! Its so nice to _finally_ meet you!" She greets him, turning her head towards me on the word finally. Hey, Its not my fault she disapproves of German rock stars for boyfriends.

Bill takes my mothers hand and gives it a light shake.

"Yes, It is pleasant to meet you too" It was weird, hearing him speak in his broken English. I was so accustomed to him talking in German. My Father decided to make his entrance now, causing my mother to delay her embarrassing introductions. He took a surprised glance at Bill, and then introduced himself.

"Um… Hello, I'm Elliot's Father." He says, not even trying to hide his glances at Bill's Hair and make-up.

"I am Bill, and I am honored to meet you" Bill said. Smooth Bill, very smooth.

"And I believe you are Tom! How could I miss you with those dreadlocks! I have seen them in the poster in Ellie's room…"

"Mom! They don't need to know about that!" I yelp. The entire band lets out nervous chuckles as I stand there, embarrassed.

"Oh? But that darn thing takes up the whole wall! Remember when I wanted to take it down and you screamed for hours about how It was 'Against your religion' or something crazy like that" Great, just great. The band has only been here for 15 minutes and I have already managed to completely humiliate my self. Tom cant breath, I'm surprised he hasn't pissed himself with delight yet. Bill couldn't help but laugh, and Gustav and Georg are trying to regain their stature behind him.

My parents both managed to confuse Georg and Gustav three different times before we sat down for dinner. My mom had made her specialty, chicken parm. The guys wolfed it down, I could tell they hadn't had home made food in a long while.

"This is great Mrs. Elliot's Mom Ma'am" Tom said in between shovels of food.

Bill simply rolls his eyes. "I'm sorry for my brothers extreme lack of…um…"

"Table manners?" I offer. Bill's English was still rough.

"Yes, thank you love." Bill says, squeezing my hand that he held under the table. I was smack in the middle between the two Kaulitz brothers, Bill on my right and Tom on my left. It seemed like ever three seconds Tom would sneak a spiteful glance at Bill and mine's intertwined hands.

"Its all right. Although I do have to say I am not accustomed to so many teenage boys at our table." My mom says, looking outnumbered.

Georg coughed from the side of the table.

"Uh… actually, Georg is 21" I corrected. My dads eyes bulged out of his head as he burst into a coughing fit. I could tell this was going to be a long night.


	12. Chapter 12

Dinner with my parents turned out to be less horrendous then I thought. After my dad recovered from 'choking on his water' I calmly explained that Georg was the oldest of the group, and that Bill and Tom where the babies. Thank god my dad forgot to ask Bill and Tom for their ages, there is no was he was going to let me keep seeing them with our two year age difference.

After they had all left, all I waited for my mom and dads approval. All she said was:

"Nice boys, don't you agree Gavin?" She asked my dad.

"I guess" He responded. I felt like a boulder had been lifted off my shoulders, I finally had parental approval.

The next day the Tokio Hotel guys had a charity concert, and Bill had insisted I come to. Tom and Georg had somehow gotten it into their head that I was their roadie, so I got the great privilege of carrying their guitar and bass all through way to Concord Gardens, which is one of the longest parks in our town. Pshaw. At least Gustav had the balls to carry his set (or maybe he thought it would tone his biceps).

"Come on Roadie! We don't want you lagging behind!" Tom says, stopping so he could walk next to me.

"If you want me to hurry up, then take your damn guitar off my back!" I huffed, trying to balance the two instruments on my back. Bill was already at the center of the park, where they where going to perform, for a sound check. So I was left to fend for myself against the guys.

"A bit cranky today, are we?" He noticed as he swung his guitar from my back to his, effortlessly.

"I need a cup of tea" I said to him. Tea was practically my anti-drug, and I hadn't had enough time this morning to boil the water. So here I was, tea-less and irritable.

"You want to hear a secret?" Tom said, bending down a bit so his face was really close to mine. I could feel myself flush. In my mind I just kept repeating: _Bill, Bill, Bill, Bill, Bill, Bill, Bill…_

"I love tea" He whispered in my ear. I could feel his cool lip ring brush my skin.

"Are you kidding me right now? Mr. Macho Tom Kaulitz loves Tea?" I replied in surprise.

"Nein! I would never lie about my love for boiled leaves!" Tom stated. We walked for a while without talking, but it was just a comfortable silence.

I could hear Bill before I saw him, the speakers spread out through out the garden broadcasted his vocal check loudly. I saw him just as he said "Fuck, I missed that last note" into the microphone. He was wearing the shirt I made him, just like he had promised. Somehow he got Tom to wear his too, even though he had already worn it three times this week.

"Good job honey!" I yelled to him up on stage, for the excellent swearing. Tom gives him a thumbs up from beside me.

"Thanks Ellie, loving the support." He said into the mic with a laugh. Georg grabbed his bass off my back and the entire band got on stage for a full sound check, running over the songs they where going to play. They where the usual songs, Monsoon, Ready, set, go!, Durch den Monsun, and Scream. Bill told me earlier that because it was just a charity concert, all they play is their most listened to songs. I sat with the band backstage while they waited to be introduced. I sat in-between Bill and Tom again, listening to some people speak onstage. I watched as an older man introduced the band.

"Hey Elliot?" Tom whispered.

"Yeah?"

"Can you let go of my dreadlock? I have to go play now" Oh, crap. I had found a habit of playing with Tom's dreadlocks when I was bored, and I didn't even realize I was doing it now.

"Oh, sorry. Good luck" I whispered, dropping a dreadlock. I gave Bill a quick peck before he went onstage and watched them from behind the scenes. I felt very privileged.

They sounded really good, better then I remembered from their concert. I started noticing the little things now hat I had seen them twice. Like the little face Tom makes during the beginning of Monsoon, and how Bill loves to stand near his brother during certain parts of the songs. Its really when they are performing that you can see the brotherly love, its like the music connects them together.

The band finishes their last song, and I wait for them to come off stage, but they don't.

"I would like to play one more song for you guys" Bill says into the microphone, his voice roars over the screaming fans. I give him a puzzled look as he glances towards me.

"You see, there's this girl backstage with us today. And she's really special to me-"

Tom interrupts his brother mid sentence.

"Us. She is special to all of us" He says, I may have imagined it, but there seemed to be a bitter tone to his voice.

"Yes, she is. So I would like to sing this song for Elliot" Bill said, covering his microphone for a minute to yell something to Georg and Gustav that I couldn't hear.

I knew the song as soon as Tom hit the first three chords. By your Side had always been one of my favorite songs, and now Bill was singing it for me. I almost cried, I swear I almost did. When he finished the song I didn't even care what was going on, I ran out on stage and hugged Bill right there during the concert. I could hear a few boo's from the girls in the audience, but I could care less.

"Goodnight everybody!" Bill says when I let go of him, and I walk off stage with the band feeling like somebody.


	13. Chapter 13

Tom had disappeared out the door before I was barely back stage.

"What's the matter with him?" Bill asks. I was surprised when Gustav and Georg shrugged at the same time I did.

"Ellie can we see you for a second?" Georg asks, pulling on my elbow a bit. Okay, this is weird.

"Uh…Sure" They lead me to a dark hall somewhere behind the stage, making sure no one could find us. Uh oh, I was going to get raped by my boyfriends best friends…

"What did you do to Tom?" Gustav asks me. He sounds like he was going to burst if he didn't ask.

"What?"

"Tom hasn't slept with a chik sense he met you. And lately he's been all weird and moody. And when ever Bill says your coming over he just gets in his car and drives. I don't think he even goes anywhere, he just drives…" Georg rants. I could tell they planned this. And based on the look on Gustav's face, it wasn't going as they had planned.

"I didn't do anything to him. We just danced." I say, not making eye contact with either of them.

Suddenly Georg is in my face, with an expression that scared me shitless.

"Tom and Bill are two of my best friends. If you are doing anything, to lead them on or otherwise, you will wish you never met us" His voice is so fierce that my body shivers.

"I would never do anything to hurt them. I love them both…very much" I whisper. Gustav pushes Georg out of my personal bubble with a concerned face. After a minute of pacing, Georg apologizes for getting in my face.

"I- I'm sorry. What are you going to do?" Georg asks, keeping his temper this time.

"The only thing I can do. Pretend its not happening and stay with Bill." I sink down the wall I was resting on in realization.

"Are you sure that's what you want to do?" Gustav inquires from across the room. I hadn't even thought about that yet.

"Of course!" I said before I could think about it.

"I mean, yeah. Bills my guy." I say, trying to sound more genuine.

Gustav and Georg lead me back to the stage, without them I'm sure I would have gotten lost. Bill had found Tom, and they where were patiently waiting for us outside the venue.

Well, maybe not so patiently. Tom looked like he had just been stung by a bee, his face pulled into a sour pout.

"I need some McDonalds" Bill said as I walked up to him. I raised one eye brow in confusion.

"I'm a fast food addict. And I haven't had McDonalds in…" He thought for a moment. "A week! I haven't had a big Mac in a week!"

"I am sorry to hear about your addiction, I don't think we should further it anymore by taking you to Mickey Dees" I respond as Bill swings an arm around my shoulders.

"Fine, then Ill take him" Tom spat at me, unlocking his Cadillac before I could protest. The rest of us where silent as we hopped in his car, watching Tom bite on his lip ring. You could practically feel the thickness of the tension, I felt like everyone in the car knew my secret except my boyfriend. Tom pulled into McDonalds after almost hitting an old lady and a stop sign, and nearly crushed the cement block that keeps you from crashing into the building.

"Tom what the hells the matter with you today?" Bill asked, abandoning me to put an hand on his brothers back. I remained silent, even though my mind was screaming the answer.

"Nothing! Why does there always have to be something wrong with me?!" He stormed into McDonalds, almost shoving a little girl on his way in. Gustav looked from me to Georg, and then back to me again, his eyes full of concern. I knew this was all my fault, but I don't know what to do about it.

Bill practically skips past his grumpy brother up to the cash register, where he ordered his Big Mac hastily. Tom orders the same thing, Georg and I get the chicken sandwich and to my surprise, Gustav gets Chicken Nuggets. I am never, EVER, letting him live that down. We sit in one of their too small booths, joking and throwing fries at each other, which eventually loosened Tom up a little. I knew he couldn't be mad forever!

"Elliot, can I ask you a question?" Bill asks, his face suddenly serious. Oh crap.

"No. Never. Go ahead" I say, as I take another bite of my chicken.

"I was wondering if you wanted to come over tonight?" Bill said. I thought I we already agreed I was going to come over for a bit?

"Uh, yeah I was kinda planning on it" I tell him.

"No, I Mean, do you want to stay over?" Toms head pops up and his smile instantly fades from his face.

"Uh… Bill, I love you, but I don't really think I'm ready for this. Why the hell are we talking about this in the middle of a McDonalds anyway?" I say, suddenly getting defensive.

"Oh! No, I don't mean like that. I just thought that maybe it would be fun, having you stay over. We don't have to do anything, definatly not" I let out a sigh of relief as he says this. It does sound kind of fun, now that I think about it. It would be like a sleepover, but with Bill!


	14. Chapter 14

I told my mother I was sleeping over at Tori's, which she ate up like French toast. Bill was too smart to let Tom drive back to the hotel, he simply fumed in the backseat next to Gustav and Georg. I could see by the way he was making constant eye contact with me through the mirror, his eyes making crazy movements I couldn't comprehend. I couldn't help aching for him, my heart understood what he was going through.

When we all got back to the hotel, we sat awkwardly on the couch and watched TV for a bit. Scrubs of course. I swear to god, these boys are addicted to that show. I love to watch them all laugh their ass's off at jokes that really aren't that funny. But the entire time there was a sickening thud lying deep in the pit of my stomach. Where was I going to sleep? With Bill or on his couch? Would Bill try and put on some unexpected moves? And what was Tom going to do about this whole situation?

I shoved these thoughts to the back of my mind and tried to cover it all up with a smile. Bill seemed thrilled with the whole situation, his glorious smile couldn't be wiped off his face. Tom on the other hand, looked like had just attended a funeral, gloom showed harshly in his brown eyes.

By the time we had watched the entire second season of scrubs (Bill and Tom own them all on DVD), it was nearly 2 in the morning. Bill practically pushed Gustav and Georg out of the room, while Tom disappeared into his room without even a warning from Bill.

"So." Bill said, when he turned to me. His face was so gloriously happy that I couldn't help but smile.

"So." I said in return. Suddenly a yawn escaped my lips, I hadn't even thought about it, but I was pretty tired. Being a roadie was tough work.

"You tired?" He asked. I nodded, unable to deny the fact that I was falling asleep where I stood.

Bill disappeared into his room and then I found clothes flying at my face. I caught them in the air, thank god I'm coordinated. I straightened out the clothes to see a black t-shirt and a pair of red checkered boxer shorts.

"I hope you don't mind, those shorts are Toms" Bill returned from his room in a pair of sweats but no shirt. To say I was still not used to shirtless guys was an understatement. I took a gulp and looked down at Tom's undergarments.

"Is there a reason you want me to wear your brothers underwear?" I asked him, a bit confused. If this was some kind of random German custom I'm not sure I can get into that…

"I'm kind of a boxer brief person myself. And I didn't want you to feel uncomfortable or anything…" Bill said, scratching the back of his neck in a shrug. He looks really cute when he's kind of embarrassed.

"Nah, its okay. Thanks for thinking of me." I brought my face real close to his face, so my lips just brushed against his. Then a suddenly turned away into his bathroom with a giggle as he groaned in disappointment. I slipped into the clothes quickly, but not so fast as to miss my reflection in the mirror.

I looked frazzled, tired, and altogether quite different. I don't think I had ever seen myself like this, excited, nervous, confused. And I liked it.

I stumbled into Bills room, the darkness of the hotel suite was putting me out. He had his room lit up by the time I reached it, I could see him leaning against his wall, almost asleep. I carefully tip-toed up to him, and before he opened his eyes, mauled him and pulled him onto his bed.

"Oh Shit-" His eyes sprung open as we tumbled nosily onto the bed. I could hear several muffled knocks on the wall from Tom's direction, and I was instantly transported back to guilt. Just as Bill was about to pound back, I pulled his arm around me. I really wanted to avoid as much contact with Tom tonight as possible, and spare him from the torture. I used my fem distraction skills to divert Bill's attention while I reached over his shoulder to turn out the light. I released my lips from Bill's and allowed him to settle into the bed. He pulled up the covers over both of us, and flashed another impeccable smile at me. I laid my head on his chest and wrapped a leg around his. He stifled a chuckle and gently rubbed my back, this had to be perfection.

"Elliot?"He whispered.

"Hm?" I was verging on sleep.

"I love you." My eyes sprung open as he said these words.

"Oh Bill," I paused to think about what I was going to say next. "I love you too."

He carefully rested his chin on the top of my head, and I nestled closer into him. We slept sprawled out together like that until morning.


	15. Chapter 15

"Good morning beautiful" Were the first words I heard that morning, along with a soft kiss to the forehead.

"Morning" I replied drearily. Bill ran his fingers through my hair and looked me in the eyes in a way that made my heart ache.

"My breath" I mumble into his comforter. He laughs and untangles me from his arms. I carefully kiss him on the cheek, avoiding breathing my gross morning breath on him.

I grab my bag on the way to the bathroom, and in a dreary haze pull out my toothbrush and attempt to put on the paste. I lean onto the counter and scrub my teeth, thinking about last night. Bill loves me. I love Him.

The door swings open from the other side of the room and Tom waltzes in, ignoring me. I roll my eyes as he almost knocks me over, grabbing a towel on the other side of the room. I continue to brush as he splashes cool water on his face.

"You look good in my shorts" He says simply, reaching for his toothbrush.

"Isn't there another bathroom in here?" I say after I spit.

"The sink is broken" He takes the toothbrush out of his mouth to respond.

"Sure" I mumble and reach for the door handle.

He grabs my arm and spins me around "Wait" He says, strongly. I cross my arms and give him a glare, but I listen to what he has to say.

"Look, ever since I danced with you that night, I haven't been able to get you out of my head. And I know, you have to feel the same way. I love Bill, and would never hurt him. But I don't know if I can stand to watch you with him anymore. I just need to know if you and I ever had a chance."

"Tom. I love your brother. And I know just as well as you do how hard this is. But we can't do it." I turn to lean against the counter when he steps towards me.

"How will you know if you never try?" I should have told him that it never could have worked. I should have told him that we could never be together. I should have told him if we had to be together, it would be a secret. I should have told him I hated him. I should have told him I loved him. I should have told him anything to avoid what he would do.

Tom Leaned over me, his hips pressing against mine into the counter. I knew what was coming, but I couldn't bring myself to stop it. Tom was very different from his brother; he didn't bother to pause before entering my personal space. He hastily lifted me onto the counter and pressed his lips to mine. It felt numb. You could tell after the immediate passion of it all, we were both searching for something. Something that wasn't there. But we didn't stop. Now as I look back on that day, I realize that we knew that there was no going back now, we might as well hold on. Boy were we idiots.

Maybe if I had just pushed him away after I realized it wasn't working I could have heard Bill calling for me. But no. I clung to that damn kiss because it had been building and building until I couldn't handle it.

"Ellie, Answer me! I'm coming in..." Of course I wouldn't recognize that Bill had said this until the door swung open.

He didn't say anything. He stood there, in total shock as Tom and I launched away from each other. He simply turned around and stumbled back into his room.

"Bill!" I yelped, catapulting off the counter with Tom in tow. Bill had his head pressed against the corner of the wall, still silent. His stance slowed us both down a bit.

"Bill?" I whimpered.

"Get. Out." He said, just audible.

"Bill. It's hard to explain." Tom approached him before Bill swung around to look him in the face.

"Don't fucking tell me it's hard to kiss my girlfriend Tom!" He yelled before looking back to me.

"Didn't I tell you to get out?" The pain in his face was indescribable.

"I'm sorry" I whimpered through tears. Before shutting the door I murmured my last words. "I still love you Bill." He didn't come after me like I thought he would. I walked home in a daze, and in both of the brother's clothes.


	16. After

That was around a year ago now. It's a good thing it all happened after finals, because I immediately went into a complete coma of depression. I didn't care about anything, anyone, or myself anymore. And to make matters worse, photographers caught me leaving the hotel in tears and rumors were spread like wildfire. Mostly about how I broke Bill's heart, but none of the tabloids ever got the story right. However, there was a wonderful spread in people magazine dedicated to the fact that I really have a penis. My family really loved that one. On the last day of school after finals, everyone was silent when I would walk into a room. Normally the last day is filled with celebration and noise, but not even teachers tried to involve me in festivities. A few bitches tried to attack me, and a couple of tools tried to ask me what happened (or how large my jock strap is), but I was lucky enough to have Tori with me, fighting off the haters. Even the emo kids gave me stares like I was some kind of freak.

I am so lucky to have her. She got me through this year. She even got me out of my bed a couple of times this summer. She also convinced me I should at least put a little effort into school my senior year. She even dressed me today. Speaking of which, today is the day of my senior voice recital. At the end of our senior year, all the singers put on a recital with just the graduating class. Tori dragged me to her house earlier and actually dressed me like I cared what I was wearing. I really didn't these days. She gave me chic black dress, black tights and black ankle boots. If I could express a lot of emotion, I would have for this outfit. She even sat with me in the chorus room now, waiting for the recital to start.

"I just really can't stand singing now." I told her, my head in my hands.

"Face it honey, you can't stand anything now." This was true. I couldn't listen to anything that wasn't Tokio Hotel. And Tokio Hotel hurt to bad to listen to. I tried to cut music out of my life, but Miss. George was convinced my voice had this new raw edge that was making it better than it had ever been. I'm just convinced this "raw edge" is the toll random emotional outbursts have taken on my voice.

"Come on Ell. It's almost time for you to go on" Tori Pulled me down the stairs and backstage to our schools obnoxious theater. I would normally be nervous out of my brains by now, but honestly, I didn't care anymore.

I walk out onstage, I can hear a couple of people and my family cheer for me.

"I'm Elliot Walters and I will be singing On My Own." I say emotionless into the microphone. The song is from Les Miserable's, and for those who don't know, it is sung by a girl who realizes that the man she loves will never love her back. I didn't pick it, Miss George did. She said I was being to "glum to sing a happy song".

"On my own, pretending he's beside me" I begin to sing. Immediately, the feelings of that day come rushing back, so I sing without thinking. I think about numbing my whole being.

I hear they are on they are working on their new album. A few people told me that their newest single released a music video on YouTube, but of course I couldn't bring myself to listen to it. I wonder all the time who he sings about now. I wonder if there are songs of hatred on this album, all about me. I wonder if Tom hates me now, too. I have also heard they both changed their hair now. Cornrows for Tom and little braids for... him. I wonder what he says in interviews about me. I wonder if he got the countless e-mails I sent him. I wonder if he ever thinks about me.

"The world is full of happiness that I have never known!" I hit the note powerful and strong, letting all the pain out. Tears immediately start to drip, and I can hear the audience reacting.

"I love him... I love him..." There is a shout from the audience but I continue to sing and cry in unison.

"I love him..." I miss you. I love you. I don't know how I'm going to continue this without you.

"But only on my..." That's when I see it. I focus through watery eyes on the audience for a moment, and standing directly in front of the stage is my dream. The loveliest hallucination I have seen yet. He is standing there; his overwhelming smile catches the stage lights just so. I blink, trying to rid myself of this terribly wonderful vision.

It doesn't go away. He's still there. He's waving at me. God, Tom's there, standing behind him, with a wondrous smile as well. But nothing compares to him.

I gasp instead of singing the last word. Some of the audience laughs, some are chattering away. He just motions me to come here. He doesn't have to do this twice. I launch off the stage and into his arms.

The audience applauds and whistles, but I don't notice. I cling to him, and from what I can tell he is holding me just as hard. I sob into his new hair. I hold him so tight, I doubt I will ever let go.

"I love you" I whimper into his ear.

"Elliot, I love you more than I can tell you."

"How?" I ask, completely perplexed.

"Tom explained it all, more than once. And I talked to Gustav and Georg about it too. I felt like everyone was keeping this big secret against me. I considered a lot of things, quitting the band, going solo, completely dropping off the map. But I realized I had more to work for than myself. After a while, I couldn't stop thinking about you. And even though I should have hated you, I couldn't. So I made up with Tom, and threw myself into work with the album. After a while, Gustav informed me that Georg and Tom had been hiding your E-mails from me. But they didn't delete them. They were saving them until they thought I was ready to read them.

"I'll tell you now, I didn't know if I was ready to read them. So one night, after a really good recording session, I sat down and decided to do it. If I didn't do it then, I wouldn't have ever done it. But I did. And I could see your pain. However, the thing that pushed me over the edge was..." He lifted his head to look around, "Tori."

"What?" I said, lifting my head to look at him. Tori Stood next to us, a mischievous smile on her full lips.

"She wrote me, telling me in excruciating detail, how miserable you were. She also told me about this event here tonight, and how you were singing a song about me. And filled with pain. I knew then that I had to come and see you." He pressed his forehead to mine, and I was incapable of speech.

"I missed you" He said. I had to laugh at that. It's been the first time in a while.

"Don't even start. At least People magazine didn't question your gender."

"Are you kidding?" He said, laughing with me now, "That's daily for me."

I recognized Tom, Gustav, and Georg in the background, and felt overwhelmed to embrace them. I let go of Bill and reached for them, Tom grabbing me first into a bear hug.

"Thank you so much." I whispered into his ear.

"No problem." He said back. He released me to hug Gustav and Georg.

"I owe you guys too" I told them, "Thank you for sticking up for me"

"We can't stand to see either of you hurting" Gustav said.

I turned to Bill and with a smile, grabbed his hand. "Let's get out of here"

He smiled his glorious smile and we ran. The audience applauded again, I could even hear my parents whooping in the background. Once we got outside, the light of the moon reflected off of the four men in front of me, and I couldn't think of anywhere I would rather be. Bill came up to me, ran his hand through my ponytail, wrapping it around his wrist. He pulled me closer until our lips found each other, and he kissed me until I cried again.

"Come to Germany with me" He said when we broke. I considered this for a moment; I hadn't applied to any schools in my depression, so I wasn't exactly ruining my future.

I guess there was someplace I would rather be.

THE END


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